The word love is thrown around quite a bit these days. It is often used, but if really heartfelt, a very special word and feeling. There are different forms of love as well that often get over looked and all clumped up into the “I love you” basic line, that’s that. Personally however, when I tell for example my mom I love her that is different from telling a friend I love them or even a partner. They are all forms of love and one does not belittle the other types of love. They just are different. In my last blog post (link here) I wrote about Philotimo, which is a Greek word for a special form of love. This type of love is hard to explain, but I tried to tackle it as best as I could in the post… so you should check it out! This blog post however, I wanted to talk about the four main types of love in the Greek language, and how we connect, use and respond to each of the forms. These four are Agape, Eros, Storge and Philia. Each defines a different form of love and each is very important in it’s own right.
Eros– Eros is named after the Greek mythological God of love Eros due to the fact it is a sensual and romantic type of love. This is the type of love between partners and is an intimate love built on physical and sexual attraction. C. S. Lewis in his book titled “The Four Loves” talked about how this love is just between two people. This love is also one of the most fleeting due to the fact it is based in the physical/sexual attraction. It can blossom into a deeper all encompassing love or can fizzle out if not built on a good foundation of trust and friendship. While there is intimacy and soul baring between couples that ultimately comes when there is a trust/understanding and partnership built up between the two.
Philia– Philia is the most general type of love and the type of love you have towards friends and all those around you. This love in my opinion is another intimate type of love due to the powerful bond between friends. Philia can be for anyone and is not just for two people like Eros is. This type of love can also be a bit like Philotimo love in the fact it is an accepting and supportive type of love where you are there for your friends and those around you. If you can find a special person to build up an Eros and Philia type of love connection… wow that would be extremely magnetic and strong. Philia is a soul baring accepting type of love and looks for the positives in the surrounding people and friendships.
Storge– This form of love is probably the least known out of the four main types of love. Storge is the love of a family, or it has been known to be an empathetic type of love as well. This bond develops naturally with those in the family having a fierce love and want to protect their loved ones. Storge is based around the need to protect and devotion you have to your family that you would do anything for them. You have each other’s backs in everything because you are family and family sticks together. This love is very different from Philia and Eros as well because you cannot choose your family. Storge is something that starts from the beginning and is with you all throughout your life.
Agape– Agape is the greatest of all loves. This form of love describes God’s type of love, which is hard to compare to the love we humans can give. It is pure, all encompassing, and sacrificial due to being based on the fact that Jesus died willingly for the sins of the world. Agape is an unconditional type of love that expects nothing from the other person and loves anyways even if hurt or rejected along the way. This is the type of love to aspire to because if we can love even just a little like this I truly think the world would be a better place, because there would be no expectations and no judgments given where they don’t belong.
There are so many forms and types of love out there these days. Each type can be special in it’s own way as well, but all are a form of love and love is incredible. To love and be loved is such a wonderful feeling. That love given could be from family, friends, a loved one, and even yourself. Loving ourselves and knowing we are worthy of love and are enough, that is important and brushed over quite a lot these days I feel. We are all worthy of so much love. Just remember when you are loving all those around you to include yourself in there as well, because how can people know how we want to be loved if we do not show first by example.
Have you experienced any or all of these four types of love?
S’Agapo!
Zavada, J. (2018, October 18). Explore 4 Types of Love in the Bible. Retrieved from https://www.thoughtco.com/types-of-love-in-the-bible-700177
Lewis, C. S. (2002). The Four Loves. HarperCollins. Retrieved from https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/14816053-the-four-loves
ablondeinthecrowd 
I love this, with all kinds of puns intended. 🙂 But I have experienced all 4. Eros really is fleeting, also the one that I believe is the most desired among others. Without Philia though, Eros is quite superficial, but doesnt make it hurt any less. Storge, that is definitely my family, through and through. My brothers and I that is a special bond. Thank you for sharing this beautiful post.
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Aw thank you Gerard! You’re awesome!
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No, you are awesome!
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This is wonderful, Mikaela! Yes, I’ve experienced all four of these over the years. Agape is always present in my life as I feel God’s presence in my life. That is the one which I can always rely on.
This past weekend was spent with friends I’ve recently met and friends I have known since college and the love and camaraderie we have was felt throughout the time we spent together. At least, I felt it and I believe others did as well.
I am fortunate to have all of my family nearby and we all get along well and support each other. That has been a blessing and strong foundation in my life for many years.
Eros can be intoxicating and blinding but also, I think, a strong component in a beautiful relationship. As you say, Mikaela, when Eros and Philia are present in a relationship, that provides some amazing potential. That’s a truly blessed situation, I think.
Well done on this, Mikaela, it’s a good exercise to see how these various forms of love are manifested in our relationships or not manifested, for that matter. Very good food for thought. Namaste, Mikaela, and thank you! 🤗🙏😍🌞
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Thank you!!! I really appreciate you reading and commenting!!! 🙂
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It’s my pleasure, Mikaela! Thank you for sharing! 😊
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Oh Mikaela, this is such a wonderful, yet complex topic. As these words were new to me, I needed to read and re-read your blog many times. From my point of view, I believe I’ve experienced all four types of love; though often, I don’t feel I’m an expert on the topic; especially Agape.
I have an intense devotion and love for people that I know, my family, and close friends, and spouse, so I believe that I’ve experienced Eros, Philia, and Storage types of love with all my heart.
Perhaps the most difficult concept for me to grasp is separating love into “types”. Is it just me, but when I love, I’m either “all-in” or “all-out”? “All-out” certainly doesn’t mean I don’t, won’t or can’t love, but rather it means that really, I’m not God, and perhaps just don’t think much about an unconditional, all-encompassing love like Agape; yet I know it is there around and in me.
I just loved your comments on the Eros and Philia connection. I’ve heard it said that you should marry your best friend. If you wish, perhaps we can discuss this sometime in private.
There is one thing I wonder about, perhaps there another Greek word or phrase that describes our love for our pets? The love is there with me, and I’m certain you feel the same very powerful attraction to our cats and dogs. They are family! Sounds strange to include this as love, but my pets are treated as family members. Sadly, I know there are kids in our countries that would just love a stable household, roof over their heads, comfortable beds, all meals, and the best care money can buy. I’d be interested to hear your thoughts. I really don’t know the answer.
So again Mikaela, thanks so much for a thought-provoking post! Take care! Love, Xoxoxo
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