Showing your true colors is not a sign of weakness. To some it might seem so; you have to always be a certain way. Always ready for what life throws your way, always okay and never show emotion. You also don’t want to have too different of a personality or style from others around you because you don’t want to stand out…. STOP STOP STOP! Where did we get these ideas from? Where did the feeling of guilt come from when we feel like we shouldn’t share our troubles with others? When we feel like we have to start lying because we still aren’t doing okay, but don’t want to keep bugging the people around us. Those aren’t weaknesses at all! In fact they are what make us so incredibly unique and powerful. We are sharing our true self and being brave. It takes a lot of courage to share the real you especially if you are struggling emotionally. We need to start viewing our realness as being powerful. We need to start seeing and believing the opposite of what a lot of society wants us to believe. That emotions can be weak, that we have to always be a certain way, always be happy. We need to break those molds and do the exact opposite. Share the real us proudly, and share our emotions and our vulnerability. Then we need to band together and support each other, because when we support each other, and love each other…. That is when we are all the most powerful.
Feeling safe to open up is always such an important first step to be yourself and real. Feeling like the people around you won’t attack you or put you down. Figure out and find the real people out there. They are out there; they’re just spread out and about it seems. When you do find them hold on to them and don’t let go. Those are the loyal like-minded people, your parea, that will create that safe space for you to open up and be yourself. You should return the favor as well for them, because we do unto others, as we would like done unto us. We want to help keep that environment safe and open for everyone as well as ourselves. Do your part to always be empathetic and open to listen. Don’t point fingers or belittle someone else’s emotions. Instead we need to support and listen. True friendship and loyalty goes far and is treasured. True friends don’t compare, but instead they create a partnership and have each other’s back in the long haul.
Being applauded for opening up is another step. This goes in line with surrounding yourself with supportive people. If they acknowledge you and applaud you for being real and open, you feel safe to do it again. You feel good and want to share more of your realness, because of the response you got. If you open up and are real and others around you don’t acknowledge that or even brush you off you’re less likely to open up again. You don’t feel worthy all of a sudden, and your opinions don’t matter and don’t need to be heard. Well that is far from the truth… It’s just being discerning and knowing who to open up around. Who is going to be receptive to the real you? Who is going to notice and encourage you to always be real? Those are the people you can safely be yourself around, and that is a good safe space to remember you always have. You want to be real every single day in every situation, but sometimes you just don’t feel like you can in certain situations. So remembering you have that safe space to be real even if you can’t be entirely yourself in the moment is encouraging. It’s not you; it’s the environment you’re in. Remember that, it’s not you it’s the environment around you. So remove yourself from that place and go somewhere else where you can truly be yourself one hundred percent of the time.
Mindset is another huge and important aspect. Thinking and viewing authenticity as powerful. Having your mind already set and made up about this fact. Not letting back talk sink in and try to talk you out of being fully yourself. Starting each day with the thought “I am going to be me today. Unapologetically me.” Don’t think, “this is how I really am, but those around me are going to think that’s stupid.” That is automatically setting you up for failure. I always say don’t bash it until you’ve tried it. You won’t ever know if people will love the real you if you never show it, and honestly the real you will be a breath of fresh air for most people! Realness is so rare these days it brightens up my day for sure when I come across an authentic person.
I read a quote today by Hans Hansen that states, “It takes nothing to join the crowd. It takes everything to stand alone.” Standing alone and strong is powerful! There will definitely be moments where you are completely alone, but that is okay. Stand your ground and don’t jeopardize your person to make someone else happy. We can’t nourish if we don’t flourish. We can’t be there for others if we ourselves are a hollow container trying to fit standards we aren’t. We instead need to be full of love, kindness, realness, security in ourselves, etc.… the list could go on forever. When we are real we are no longer hollow. We are grounded in ourselves and know in the long haul being real and true to ourselves is the best way to go. There will always be days where it is tougher than others, or we feel we have to wear a façade to be accepted. Why would we want to be accepted as a façade though? Everyone should meet the real you AND if the real you is too much for some people to handle then move on. Keep a strong circle of people you love around you and don’t be afraid to also stand alone if the moment ever arises. Like my new shirt says that I shared on my Instagram page this past weekend. Warrior not Worrier. Don’t worry that people won’t like you. Instead be a warrior and powerful in your own authenticity. Stand strong in yourself. Realness attracts realness. The journey will be tough sometimes, but so worth it when you fully and completely realize, and embrace how incredible the real you is. It is definitely rewarding! Xo
In the end, when it is all over, all that matter is what you have done.
Alexander the Great
Photo by Zachary Tyler Photography