Check In With Yourself

Honest check in….. This summer hasn’t been the smoothest for me and it’s not even over yet! Lots of ups and downs and for me there where a couple BIG downs that seemed to overshadow the ups. There are some days when I just want to sit down and cry, or fast forward a bit in the future to when I feel better and more back to myself. The two biggest lows for me were losing my grandma and then my cat, both in my life for all of it and then eighteen years of it. So I have been processing through loss too, loss and grief. I wanted to share this post as just a reminder to everyone, as well as myself, that we need to check in with ourselves. We need to every once in a while see if we need a break, or hug, or something else. AND we need to know that our journey through healing is OUR journey and we can take as long as we need to process everything. Nobody can rush you on your journey. Feel your pain and emotions, and then let it go in your own time.

One way that helps me feel better or process through the emotions a bit better is taking a pause. Not stopping, no just a pause from some of the craziness of my day. Take yourself out of situations that might be over stimulating you. For me this is usually getting outside if I can or staying home and playing music. Allow yourself to relive memories. Allow yourself to work through the emotions you are feeling. If you need to cry, then cry. If you need to sing or scream or lie down do it. Do whatever you feel would make you feel better. I love reliving my favorite memories that I have with both my grandma and kitty. Sometimes it really hurts and sometimes it is exactly what I need in the moment. That happy story and highlight I will always have with me. Remember the love and moments you shared and how they shaped your life and helped make you the way you are today.

NEWS FLASH- I wrote in the first paragraph that you can take as long as you need on your journey of recovery. Your journey of healing is not a race. It’s not who can be better first, or who can be all healed the fastest, no we should take the time to fully feel every aspect of the journey. Every memory, every feeling, every emotion… etc. We watch the pieces come back together slowly and naturally, not rushed and sloppily. So if someone asks how you are doing answer honestly. Answer however you want to, stay true to yourself and don’t try to patch up quickly for someone else’s convenience. It’s okay to not always be okay. You don’t have to delve deeply into your back story with others, no you can just simply say you aren’t doing well, but are slowly healing and processing at your own pace.

It’s okay to ask for help, it’s okay to ask for even just a hug or someone to sit by you. The people who care about you and are offering you love and support are there for just that. Use that resource… You are not alone. Sometimes we feel like we are stranded on a deserted island in the middle of the sea of our emotions alone, but often enough we just don’t see the rope being thrown our way. There are those helping hands, those comforting arms and ears to listen so use them if you need to. It is often very comforting talking through feelings, emotions, processing what is going on in our brain. Holding it all in all the time definitely isn’t the healthiest. We don’t want to burst, but if we do in the end that is okay too. Cry it out and know it is part of the journey of life.

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ALSO know everyone processes differently. No one is going to feel or heal exactly like you do. One way might work for someone and then not work for someone else. Life isn’t a cookie cutter and no one is exactly the same so a tried and true method that might work for someone isn’t going to work for everyone out there. So be open to trying new options or being there for others in a way that is different to you. Don’t be afraid to ask people to be there for you in a specific way that you know will help you and always be open and patient with other’s if they ask you to be there for them in a specific way as well.

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This post is pretty much a reminder to me and hopefully helpful to you all as well. Check in with yourself and take all the time you need to process through your emotions. It will be almost like a roller coaster ride for a while. There will be good and amazing days and then there will be days that plummet and leave you feeling even worse than before. Time will heal the wounds, time will smooth out the path for you and life will get easier slowly and surely. Just take a deep breath, take it a day at a time, and know you are not alone.

S’Agapo

Photo by Stephan Bullard

17 Comments Add yours

  1. I love this post so much ♡ It is okay to take your time to heal and it’s important to give yourself time to be able to just sit with your emotions. I’m very sorry for your losses and will keep you and your journey in my thoughts. Much love.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. mjaquette says:

      Aw thank you so much!! Sending you love!!!!

      Like

  2. I’m so sorry for your losses!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. mjaquette says:

      Thank you love!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. bricuzisaidso says:

    Thanks so much for the reassurance girl! Sometimes it’s so hard for me to just pause and process so I’m trying to remember to check in more. I feel a lot better knowing that other people know exactly what I’m feeling, and with that I’d like to remind you; you always have a friend in me! I’m only a message away!!
    Great read girl, it was exactly what I needed today.
    xo Bri

    Liked by 1 person

    1. mjaquette says:

      awwww I’m
      Glad it resonated with you love!! Xoxoxo

      Like

  4. Alex Grace says:

    Firstly, I’m sorry for the losses you’ve experienced and wish you far better times ahead.
    Wise and well-written as always Mikaela! You have a spot-on way of putting things x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. mjaquette says:

      Aww thank you so much. Xoxoxo

      Liked by 1 person

  5. This is such a deep post. And sorry for your loss hope you go through it well.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. mjaquette says:

      Thank you so much! I appreciate you!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. justnatonya says:

    Mikaela I’m sorry about your losses sis. I’m here for you❤️ I agree with you. Last June, my high school friend of 15 years committed suicide and it wrecked me to the core. It was nice to be around others who provided comfort. I agree with you, you just can’t rush the process. Sometimes you gotta go through the pain to feel a little bit better. Thanks for sharing your wisdom ❤️

    Natonya | https://www.justnatonya.wordpress.com

    Liked by 1 person

    1. mjaquette says:

      Thank you so much for sharing love. You are so incredible xoxo

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Simply, Me says:

    I’m really sorry for your losses, this post is important for everyone, thank you x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. mjaquette says:

      It’s so important!! Thank you xoxo

      Liked by 1 person

  8. NatGutmor says:

    Thank you so much for talking about this. I’ve been having a rough year, and taking time away from the madness is vital. I wrote this morning about how journaling has helped me through those challenges, and I hope that can help if you want to take a look.
    I admire so much your transparency as a blogger, in admitting your vulnerability and showing your strength in finding solutions.
    I hope you have an amazing week

    Lindifique

    Liked by 1 person

    1. mjaquette says:

      Aw wow thank you so much for this beautiful comment! You are amazing. Sending lots of love to you!

      Like

  9. Frank D says:

    This post is fantastic!! It probably sounds strange, but way back, I seemed to learn to deal with family and friends passing away; but not pets!! Having said that, your whole discussion about grieving and suggestions on how to deal with it really hits home. You are such a kind & wise lady! I have indeed found that time is the great healer. You’ve covered everything! Incredible post; Thanks Mikaela. 🥰🥰🥰

    Liked by 1 person

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